Steps To Having More Joy In Your Life (Part2)

"Negativity only sees uncertainty and hardships; Positivity only sees opportunity and blessings."

-Pamela B.

Last time, in part 1 of this series, I shared how focus can play of a big role in having more joy in your life. Today, I'm going to talk about perspective. Which is to me one of the main reasons why even the smallest of things can suck the joy of our days. The word "perspective" has two meanings, but the one I'm going for is, a particular attitude toward or way of regarding something.

Here are two types of situations in my life where perspective was everything.

Situation 1:

When we were living in Wilmington there came a point in time where we had to find another place to live or else we'd be living in our car. The soccer (football) team my husband played for provided housing, but once the season ended we had to move out. The only problem was that we had no place to go. On top of that, it was hard finding an apartment because we didn't actually know when the season would officially end. It all depended on if they made it to the playoffs or not. But mostly we didn't want to sign a lease anywhere because we didn't know how much longer we were going to live in Wilmington. There were just too many unknown variables for us to decide on anything. 

Now any normal human being would have been freaking out not knowing where they were going to live, or how long these uncertain times would last. They probably would freak out knowing they will never have any answers until they randomly show up one day. Even some of our friends told us how crazy, worried they would be if they were in our shoes.

Situation 2:

Not too long ago I was at a point in my life where I felt like I was drowning. Everybody around me was working hard to pursue their dreams and looking pretty successful. And I have to admit, I just really wanted to throw a pity party. I was living with my (hard working) parents when my husband was hard at work pursing his dream and looking for a place for us to live. Meanwhile, I was watching Netflix everyday, I hardly had any clients and therefore thought I had nothing to do with my life. And let's not forget to mention I barely went out of the house because most of my friends had moved away or were still in college.

I felt like a huge bum with no job and no sense of purpose or reason...

Can you just feel the dark cloud of negativity??

And I honestly could have kept that horrible perspective of my life and I did for a while.

BUT in reality....

1. I'm a newly wed
2. A lot of change happened in a short amount of time causing me to put my career on hold
3. I was only in business for 3 months before all the change happened
4. Most businesses don't take off until well after the second year
5. I actually have things I could be doing, that will help me gain clients
6. Not having as many clients helps me get my business plan organized
7. Not having as many clients helps me to create concrete business procedures
8. If I was too busy I would still be doing things randomly and unorganized 
9. If I was too busy I wouldn't have as much time to spend with my husband 

Situations might not change, but our perspectives can!

All that stuff that was going on in my life didn't change right away...I'm still in, what I like to call "client limbo" but I now have this unexplainable, joy and peace in my heart. Despite my circumstances I'm still laughing, smiling, and enjoying my days. And it's all because of my perspective.

I'm normally the type of person who looks on the bright side of things, with an occasional negative view. But one perspective God always brings me back to is, "it's just another way for Him to get glory". It's just Him making or allowing things to look soooo crazy and then at the right moment, show off with all His power, wisdom, and goodness. It's quite exciting actually, because you never know what He's going to choose to do, but you know it's gonna be good so you don't have to worry.

"And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose."

-Romans 8:28

Ever since I got a real understanding of this verse...I never let it go.

I just can't help but see everything as good (even if it looks bad at the moment)

Because God called me and I love Him, He will always take the good stuff and the"not so good stuff" and make them both work out to benefit me in the end. And the messier, crazier, and more chaotic it looks, the more glory He'll receive. Plus I'll have more stories I can tell to shock people....which in turn gives God all the glory.

Ultimately the way you look at your life and circumstances, whether positive or negative, is completely up to you. You have to make that choice.

What do you find yourself doing more?

I Probably Wouldn't be Married if it Wasn't for These Women

Feature Friday

Okay so today I wanted to introduce to you my sisters.

But first off, for those of you who know me but don't know about my sisters are probably like..."What?? I thought she was the only girl". Well you're right. I am the only girl, and I'm the youngest at that (yup...I'm basically the favorite...I know this because I still get the perks, even at 23 years of age)

While I don't have any sisters where we share the same parents, I do have sisters who share the same Heavenly Father. So if you think about it...technically we are sisters by blood...just not our blood, but Jesus's blood. But that's besides the point. I met these women (and many others that I don't have photos of yet) during my first semester at Liberty University through "Bridging The Gap Urban Ministries" BTG for short. And I can't say all of our relationships started out solid, but they surely ended up that way. I can honestly say, that if it wasn't for  God putting them in my life, I would have transferred from Liberty after that first semester. And then I have no idea what my life would have been like. But I do know that had I transferred schools I wouldn't be married to the sweetest, sexiest, cutest, man alive. 

My sisters played a HUGE role in my college years and helped me develop into the woman I am today. They, and many others, taught me so much about God, the bible and what Jesus' sacrifice truly meant for my life. I love them so much and I wouldn't trade them for anything. Like I said before, I'm the only girl in my family and I honesty believe that they are the sisters that I used to ask God for when I was younger. And now I have more than I can even count. Now-a-days we're miles apart now,  but if I ever need them, I know they would always be there for me.

These are a few photos I took from my last visit. We had an impromptu photo shoot. It was so much fun! I'm looking forward to my next visit. Hopefully, then, I'll be able to see more of my sisters.

 

For all the ladies who wax at home...you should read this!

Happy Monday!

I hope your day wasn't too bad! If it was...well let's hope this story, written by a woman named Emma White, will put a smile on your face and get you laughing.

It's a tragically hilarious story about self-waxing...

I know all the ladies out there have had at least one embarrassing/painful experience with venturing into the world of waxing at home. I'm a victim too...and trust me it wasn't pretty.

But this woman's waxing experience takes the cake! Here's what she wrote:

"My night began as any other normal weeknight. Come home, fix dinner, and play with the kids. I then had the thought that would ring painfully in my mind for the next few hours: ‘Maybe I should pull the waxing kit out of the medicine cabinet.' 

So I headed to the site of my demise: the bathroom. It was one of those ‘cold wax’ kits. No melting a clump of hot wax, you just rub the strips together in your hand, they get warm and you peel them apart and press them to your leg (or wherever else) and you pull the hair right off.

No mess, no fuss.

How hard can it be?

I mean, I’m not a genius, but I am mechanically inclined enough to figure this out. (YA THINK!?!)

So I pull one of the thin strips out. Its two strips facing each other stuck together. Instead of rubbing them together, my genius kicks in so I get out the hair dryer and heat it to 1000 degrees. (‘Cold wax,’ yeah…right!)

I lay the strip across my thigh. Hold the skin around it tight and pull.

It works!

OK, so it wasn’t the best feeling, but it wasn’t too bad. I can do this! Hair removal no longer eludes me!

I am She-rah, fighter of all wayward body hair and maker of smooth skin extraordinaire.

With my next wax strip I move north after checking on the kids, I sneak back into the bathroom, for the ultimate hair fighting championship.

I drop my panties and place one foot on the toilet.

Using the same procedure, I apply the wax strip across the right side of my bikini line, covering the right half of my hoo-ha and stretching down to the inside of my butt cheek (it was a long strip) ..

I inhale deeply and brace myself…RRRRIIIPPP!!!!

I’m blind!!! Blinded from pain!!!!….OH MY GAWD!!!!!!!!!

Vision returning, I notice that I’ve only managed to pull off half the strip.

CRAP!

Another deep breath and RIPP!

Everything is spinning and spotted.

I think I may pass out…must stay conscious…must stay conscious.

Do I hear crashing drums???

Breathe, breathe…OK, back to normal. 

I want to see my trophy – a wax covered strip, the one that has caused me so much pain, with my hairy pelt sticking to it. I want to revel in the glory that is my triumph over body hair. I hold up the strip!

There’s no hair on it.

Where is the hair???

WHERE IS THE WAX???

Slowly I ease my head down, foot still perched on the toilet. I see the hair. The hair that should be on the strip…it’s not! I touch. .. I am touching wax!!

I run my fingers over the most sensitive part of my body, which is now covered in cold wax and matted hair. Then I make the next BIG mistake…remember my foot is still propped upon the toilet? I know I need to do something. So I put my foot down.

Sealed shut! My butt is sealed shut. Sealed shut!

I penguin walk around the bathroom trying to figure out what to do and think to myself ‘Please don’t let me get the urge to poop. My head may pop off!’

What can I do to melt the wax?

Hot water!! Hot water melts wax!!

I’ll run the hottest water I can stand into the bathtub, get in, immerse the wax-covered bits and the wax should melt and I can gently wipe it off, right???

*WRONG!!!!!!!*

I get in the tub – the water is slightly hotter than that used to torture prisoners of war or sterilize surgical equipment – I sit.

Now, the only thing worse than having your nether regions glued together, is having them glued together and then glued to the bottom of the tub…in scalding hot water.

Which, by the way, doesn’t melt cold wax.

So, now I’m stuck to the bottom of the tub as though I had cemented myself to the porcelain!! God bless the man who had convinced me a few months ago to have a phone put in the bathroom!!!!!

I call my friend, thinking surely she has waxed before and has some secret of how to get me undone. It’s a very good conversation starter ‘So, my butt and hoo-ha are glued together to the bottom of the tub!’

There is a slight pause.

She doesn’t know any secret tricks for removal but she does try to hide her laughter from me. She wants to know exactly where the wax is located, ‘Are we talking cheeks or hole or hoo-ha?’

She’s laughing out loud by now…I can hear her. I give her the rundown and she suggests I call the number on the side of the box.

YEAH!!!!! Right!! I should be the joke of someone else’s night.

While we go through various solutions, I resort to trying to scrape the wax off with a razor. Nothing feels better than to have your girlie goodies covered in hot wax, glued shut, stuck to the tub in super hot water and then dry-shaving the sticky wax off!!

By now the brain is not working, dignity has taken a major hike and I’m pretty sure I’m going to need Post-Traumatic Stress counseling for this event.

My friend is still talking with me when I finally see my saving grace….the lotion they give you to remove the excess wax.

What do I really have to lose at this point? I rub some on and … OH MY GAWD!!!!!!! The scream probably woke the kids and scared the dickens out of my friend.

Its sooo painful, but I really don’t care.

‘IT WORKS!!

It works!!’ I get a hearty congratulation from my friend and she hangs up. I successfully remove the remainder of the wax and then notice to my grief and despair…?

THE HAIR IS STILL HERE…….ALL OF IT!

So I recklessly shave it off.

Heck, I’m numb by now.

Nothing hurts.

I could have amputated my own leg at this point.

Next week I’m going to try hair color……"

I can't even imagine what she might do to her hair. But there's a lesson to be learned here...just get a professional to do it. And if you can't afford it, then I guess you better stick to shaving. That or can use  Veet's "ready to use wax strips" I've used those myself and I didn't have any problems. Plus they actually work! It's still painful...but it works. You can get them anywhere, from Walmart to Walgreens.